I brought the wrong cereal bar

Why is it some days whatever you do as a parent it's just not enough for some children. Baby's happy aslong as my boob is full of milk. Eldest however is having a bad day which in turn makes me not like her very much. Are we allowed to say that. I love her with all my heart and would die for her but sometimes I don't like her.

This morning I was being mean by wanting to sleep untill 7am. This isn't a new thing we grow clock has always been set to 7am and she knows to stay in her room. This morning however mean mummy made her stay in her room for 40 mins.

She the chirped up a bit because I let her wear her summer dress to nursery so all smiles and hugs until I needed to go to the post box before school which she didn't want to do so back to grumpy child.

After school I brought the wrong cereal bar and no drink and all hell broke loose. Whining silly put on crying all the way home thank god I live close to the school or I'd have lost it I think. Now babys going down for a nap and I can hear her happily playing but dread going downstairs as I'm sure it will start it all off again when I ask the question of what shall we have for dinner. Roll on 4.15 when hubby returns and roll on 7pm some much needed adult conversation over dinner with mates.

And breathe ...

All the things I said id never do!!

Whilst on twitter earlier today I saw a conversation by some mummy and daddy types that made me think about the things I always said Id never do when I had kids and that I now do....

I think its very easy when your childless to make judgements of Id never let my child do that but a few years on many sleepless nights and tantrums later its anything for an easy life most of the time.

My list was

Fruit shoots - bottles of sugar, never my children will just drink water of course. Now it keeps her quiet she likes the taste and once in a while doesn't hurt as a treat, she certainly doesn't have them all the time but when we go for chips and nuggets, which is another thing...
McDonald's - no way are they having happy meals no way no way, well ok then were in a rush I forgot to get anything out the freezer and the pastas run out and were on the way to nannies so ok then yeah fruit shoot might as well chuck that into the mix too.
Frozen food - I've got my Annabel karmel books I'm armed with pots and pans so there will always be a good homemade meal on the table, except for those days when I cant be arsed to make from scratch and I know she'll eat all the chicken Kiev's and chips or fish fingers or pie that goes on the plates and seconds instead of turning away my slaved over dish of something homemade
DVDs and telly - well 30 mins a day of strictly controlled viewing wont hurt, obviously these rules were made before I realised how tired Id be after working until 1am getting up with children through the night and then up for the day at 6am when I actually put CBeebbies or milkshake on for a sneaky extra hour of much needed sleep or the dvd to lull her off for the naps that she wont take any other way.  Now I dread a day without the telly at some point but I could leave baby Jake out annoying little.....
Dummies- my kids wont have dummies uggghhhh how common, one whiny baby who is using mummy to suck my god did I love the dummy my friend lent me to try unfortunately eldest didn't take to it but from the start youngest was given one and shes not the best at it but I don't have much trouble with her. I think my problem was the 4 year olds with them in their gob still walking about which wont happen.
Formula milk - I was determined to breast feed and luckily Ive been able to do this with both girls but wasn't going to have formula milk ever- not sure what I thought would happen once Id gone back to work, well she went onto formula and she didn't combust or anything as they'd probably have you believe and baby will be put onto formula when the time comes.
Clark's shoes - as a former employee of nearly 10 years I was adamant she would have fitted shoes but they are expensive and not high on the cute factor needless to say a few other cute shoes have made their way into the home

I'm sure this list could go on and on...suppose moral of the story is never judge until your shattered and harassed mummy and we all do what we have to to get through the day!

time to be a brave girl

As a mum Ive come to learn that its a bit like my job, never the same day twice.  This is what I love about my job and cant wait to see what the evening will hold for me when I set foot through the door at 5pm.  Sometimes as a mum this can be fun also but mainly I like the routine of our normal day and I actually think the girls like it too. The baby certainly does and I think shes thriving on the routine we have knowing what comes next and shes certainly a lot more laid back than Sophie was at this age.  Maybe its the inner child in me that likes to know whats coming next and like the security of familiar surroundings and occasions.

So with my eldest starting nursery it was inevitable Id have to be a grown up mummy soon enough. the time has come as she came home the other day with a party invite in her book bag. Id love to ignore it much like Ive ignored plenty of invites in the past if it was out of my comfort zone and not done things because I'm wary of new situations but I'm getting braver as I get older and the girls certainly help with that too. Sophie was at playgroup for a year and I hardly spoke to any of those mums and didn't go to one of the parties she was invited to as I just struggled with standing around like a spare part not knowing anyone out of my comfort zone thus meaning Sophie misses out just because of my shyness. Ive made an effort now shes at nursery and speak to a few mums in the playground and am trying to make more of an effort with this shyness. Luckily Sophie's not shy anything but and this I'm grateful for, so time to take a leaf out of my daughters book and take her to this party and be a big brave girl. 

 Maybe I'll get a sticker for being a brave girl??

Growth spurts and weaning

So I think we have reached the point of weaning.  I really wanted to wait for the 6 month mark even signed us up to a food study in which we were placed into the group that waited 6 months before weaning but after a week now of feeding 2-3 hours all the time i think its time. At first I was thinking we had reached the 4 month growth spurt and maybe we have but after a whole week of such regular feeding I think its passed and Molly is just hungry and possibly the emptying of both breasts and still getting cross with me as she still seems hungry is a sign, although my supplys increased over the week with another child I cant continue this feeding at such short intervals for another 2 months.

As Molly is my last planned baby I wanted to enjoy all the babyness for as long as i could. Sophie had rushed me along every stage, I always said she was an old soul who had been here before and knew what she wanted never happy until she was onto the next stage. So Molly was going to be my baby for as long as I could manage and the first thing being weaning, i wanted 6 months just breast milk but feeding so often is physically exhausting me.  The first sign being going out for a much needed night out and going home to bed by 10pm due to a migraine. I only get these when I'm exhausted and starts with tunnel vision onto full blown migraine. Its wiped me out all weekend and could have slept and slept but being a mum of two I carried on best I could and a few early nights I will be back to an acceptable level of tiredness soon enough.

Anyway weaning, what first?

baby rice, pureed fruit and veg. suppose time to get the books out again, buy all the random fruit and veg and prepare the feeding area.....as much as I wanted to wait still looking forward to cooking and experimenting with foods and redecorating the carpet and walls (hope the landlord doesn't mind)

let the fun begin.